Calm in the Chaos

Now that we’re past Thanksgiving (I’m still feeling thankful AND stuffed!), it’s easy to sense the excitement and the pressure building over the next few weeks. Talking with Jackie, and looking at my work calendar through the end of the year, I’m thinking “there’s so much to do, so many people to see, and so many little details to manage”. It’s that holiday crunch time we all slide into – trying to get everything done and wanting to make everything special for the people (and customers) we love. Experts say this can be a tough time of year, which can leave us feeling more exhausted than joyful. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. The good news is, with a few intentional choices, we can get our work done and chores completed while bringing more peace and joy back into the season (and actually enjoy it, too). Here’s a bit about stress, and some really great tips on how to find time to relax a bit and reduce the pressure. Remember, stress can sometimes be a state of mind (I’ve started some of these already and feel better!) RELAX and Enjoy!

Stress is that feeling when your shoulders tighten, your patience runs thin, and your mind won’t stop spinning through everything you need to do. It’s the body’s way of responding to pressure or demands. A little stress can help us get things done — but when it piles up, it can steal our sleep, energy, and peace of mind. Good stress is called “eustress” and bad stress is called “distress.” Learn more here.
During the holidays, stress often creeps in because we care so deeply. We want to create happy memories, or re-create memories, find the perfect gifts, cook wonderful meals, have friends and family over, and make everyone feel joyful and included.
Before diving into the wrapping paper or the shopping lists, pause. Take a deep breath and ask yourself: What really matters most to my family and me this year? How can I resist all the “should do’s” and find some simple, meaningful things to focus on? Usually, it’s not the decorations or the perfect meal — it’s the laughter, the warmth, true giving, and the memories we create together.
Here are some tips I found online, along with some “Steve” ideas sprinkled in:

Let Go of “Perfect”

No one remembers if the gravy was lumpy or the bows matched (especially the kids and grandkids). They remember how they felt — loved, included, and cared for. Aim for connection, not perfection. Simplify and just have fun! For a nutty night, invite some friends over, and make a mess with cookies – see who can make the worst gingerbread man (Always me!).

Keep It Simple

You don’t have to do everything. Choose the few family traditions and gatherings that truly bring you joy, and let go of the rest. Set a time after the holiday crunch (host a party in January) and make that something to look forward to in the New Year.

Make a Realistic Budget

Set spending limits before you shop. Thoughtful gifts don’t need big price tags — handwritten notes, homemade treats, or shared experiences often mean far more. Let the internet ease the load on your wallet – find deals that mean just as much as “the big stuff”.

Build in Quiet Nights

Block off a few evenings for nothing but rest. I LOVE making a fire, and having a hot chocolate or “hot totty”, and chillin’ in my PJs with Jackie. We always make time to watch “It’s A Wonderful Life” together (for the 78th time) and still fight the tears when George comes home at the end, and all their friends shower them with love.

Ask for Help – Offer to Help

You don’t have to do it all. Let the kids and grandkids help decorate, ask guests and friends to bring dishes, or offer to help your spouse. (I especially enjoy being the sous chef!). Sharing the load makes the season easier on everyone.

Keep Up Healthy Habits

Eat balanced meals when you can, drink water, move your body, limit your alcohol intake, and get enough sleep. Stress feels heavier when you’re overdoing it or running on empty.

Eat A Favorite Meal

At the same time, make time to occasionally go off script and make something really special (or go out for dinner). Dive into a cozy soup, or cook something “just silly”, like a plate of French fries, “just because.” Dive into the indulgence and chill. I promise you’ll feel better.

Step Outside

A short walk in the cold air can clear your head and lift your spirits. We LOVE going for walks, especially when the snow falls. And be sure to take the family to see neighborhood lights or stroll through a park together. I love driving around with the grandkids and seeing all the lights – love the looks on their faces!

Focus on Meaning

Shift from “doing more” to “feeling more.” Volunteer as a family, attend church often and together, say your prayers, and share what you’re grateful for before a meal. It brings the season’s true spirit back into focus.

Practice Gratitude

Take a moment each day to name three things you’re thankful for. Gratitude is a simple, powerful way to quiet the chaos and remind yourself of the good around you. At work, be sure to thank the people around you – they are stressed too, and can use some encouragement and praise this time of year.

Color with the Kids

This is so easy and fun. Get some big holiday coloring books, break out the crayons, and just color together. The little one (and the big ones) will have a blast. Chit chat, put on some fun music, and make it a quiet party. (Google Large Holiday Coloring books…there’s a whole bunch)

Be Present

Put down the phone, pause the planning, and really be there. Sometimes, the best holiday memories happen in the quiet in-between moments – the laughter after dinner, the car ride home, or the cozy mornings in pajamas. Here’s a test… put your phone in the drawer for 2-3 hours and just walk away. Initially, you’ll be “really stressed”, but hopefully after a bit, you’ll feel free.

Finish That Book

Find the book you didn’t finish this year. Comfy chair, nice light, cozy sweats, fuzzy socks, nice beverage – It’s magical!!

Go See A Friend or Neighbor

Find time to connect with old friends (and family members). Grab a coffee, watch a ballgame, or just BS for a while – the memories and laughs will come, so let it flow. No pressures, just hangin’ out together will do the trick.

Remember, the holidays don’t have to be perfect to be wonderful. Sometimes, it’s the messy, funny, silly, lazy, ordinary moments that become the ones we treasure most. Give yourself permission to slow down, say no when you need to, and savor the small joys around you. That’s where the real magic of the season lives – not in the rush, but in the pause. Now make it happen – and SMILE!!