Let’s Keep Trying

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(left column top to bottom) Remember hay fever season? If you can’t get relief from a box of Zyrtec you could at least have a lot of tissue on hand … or on head;  Do you live alone? This pillow buddy is for you;  New shoes? This cool device will save them;  This is how to clean small messes without bending over; The eco minded can collect rain water on the way to work;  Eye drop glasses. Brilliant!;  An extender for your umbrella will keep your nice clothes nice and dry;  Solve this Rubics cube in one turn;  Never be late for work with this anti-snooze feature for your alarm; (right column top to bottom)  Now be stylish and prepared for rain;  Ahh, the solar flashlight;  Hey, kids are cute and now they can help keep the floors dusted;  Pets can help with the dusting, too;  This device will keep your lipstick off your face;  This device will keep your hair out of your noodles;  And this device will cool your noodles;  The shoe brush;  The commuter’s nap hat;  And the head prop for office naps. All wonderfully stupid devices.

 

Running a 24-7 business, focused on solving our client’s PIA (pain in the @%$) Jobs!™ is a blast.  All of my teams understand the importance of thinking, problem solving, testing and retesting, and just trying different approaches until we get it just right.  I encourage everyone to “free their mind” and challenge the status quo. Although, Jackie often tells me that I should focus more! Sometimes we “nail it” early on, or end up with extra solutions that don’t quite have an application. Sometimes, the solutions are so close we think we’re there, only to get a curve ball when not expected.  I was wondering what we could do with those “extras” and found a group out of Japan, that not only encourages inventive thinking, but actually developed a whole movement for those inventions that make sense on paper, but most likely will never see the light of day.  It’s called Chindōgu (www.chindogu.com) – (translated means “unusual tool”) and the definition fits it perfectly … ideas that lie in that gray area – “not exactly useful, but somehow not altogether useless”.  So remember for that someone who has everything!  Just some of my favorites…

  • A combined household duster and cocktail-shaker, for the housewife who wants to reward herself as she is working along.
  • The all-day tissue dispenser (basically a toilet roll fixed on top of a hat) for hay fever sufferers.
  • Duster slippers for dogs and cats, so they can help out with the housework too.
  • The all-over plastic bathing costume, to enable people who suffer from aquaphobia to swim without coming into contact with water.
  • The baby mop outfit worn by babies, so that as they crawl around, the floor is cleaned.
  • And my “laugh out loud favorite” – a solar powered flashlight (stop and think about this for a second).

Chindōgu it turns out, is a prank originating from Japan, which is done by a person seemingly inventing ingenious everyday gadgets that seem like an ideal solution to a particular problem but are in fact nothing more than a useless gag.  And there are thousands of them.  So, for this week, I pulled together a little history, and some meaningless examples – ENJOY, and thank chindogu.com and Wikipedia for the info.

  • The movement was started by Kenji Kawakami, Japanese gadget guru extraordinaire and anarchic progenitor of chindogu, inventions that are almost completely useless, or to borrow Kawakami’s word, “unuseless.”
  • He has created more than 600 examples of chindogu — a made-up word literally meaning strange tools’ in Japanese — and has built an international cult following of thousands through his books about them and appearances on TV, the Internet, in magazine columns and museum exhibits.
  • But what exactly is a chindogu? They’re more easily defined by what they’re not: neither useful, political, patented, or for sale. But they are seemingly serviceable, certainly silly and always analog. Like Zen koans of invention, chindogu are designed to be both profound contradictions and simple tools to awaken the heart and mind.
  • Kawakami began dreaming up doodads in the 1980s while editing popular home shopping magazine Tsuhan Seikatsu and has since produced such unuseless wonders as the Solar-Powered Flashlight, the Rotating Spaghetti Fork and the Velcro Jogger. Yet he doesn’t own any patents and has never made a single yen by selling his creations.
  • Said Kawakami, “In the modern, digital world, everything is so quick,” he says, picking up paper and electronic dictionaries to illustrate. “With the electronic one, it only takes two seconds to find a word, but it gives us no mental or spiritual satisfaction. Yet if you use your own hands to find it, you can enjoy the process. It’s a spiritual act.”
  • There are roughly 8,000 chindogu practitioners in Japan and 1,000 overseas, their ages ranging from 10 to 70, according to Kawakami.
  • Good chindogu happens when – You don’t need to have it explained to you. It’s just in you. It shakes you in a funny way that you can’t help but get in touch with the basic human quality of being alive. “Cause when you’re laughing and smiling, you’re alive,” he says.
  • People outside Japan have had mixed reactions to chindogu. In North America, they’re viewed as amusing Japanese party gags, in Europe as a new art form, and in Hong Kong and Taiwan as potential moneymakers. But because of their universal appeal, Kawakami doesn’t see chindogu as ‘Japanese’ at all. “Being free is the most important thing in life. Chindogu is the symbol of freedom, a free soul is needed to think of chindogu, to think of stupid, crazy things. You can never do it with common sense alone.”

 

 

Cozy Warm

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Knitted or printed, store bought or hand-made, there’s nothing like a cozy warm scarf on a winter day.

After enjoying an amazing string of beautiful weather days this past holiday season, and another week of sunshine (got up to almost 60 here on the north coast), I found myself this morning reaching into the closet and grabbing a scarf since it was 20F when I got up!  What a simple, amazing invention.  Then, of course, when I got to the office, I decided to poke around on the internet and get the skinny on where these came from, and just how far back the historians can track them.  I’m guessing Mr. Caveman saved a piece of fur for his lovely wife, so she’d be warm on the trek to the hinterlands. This had to be much better than the bark one he first gave her!

  1. A scarf, plural scarves, is a common piece of neckwear, typically a single piece of fabric worn around the neck for warmth, sun protection, cleanliness, fashion, or religious reasons. Scarves are made in a variety of different materials such as wool, linen or cotton.
  2. Scarves have been worn since ancient times. The Statue of Ashurnasirpal II from the 9th century BC features the emperor wearing a shawl. In Ancient Rome, the garment was used to keep clean rather than warm. It was called a focale or sudarium (sudarium from the Latin for “sweat cloth”) and was used to wipe the sweat from the neck and face in hot weather and were originally worn by men around their neck or tied to their belt.  Think of the American Cowboy!
  3. Historians believe that during the reign of the Chinese Emperor Cheng, scarves made of cloth were used to identify officers and the rank of Chinese warriors.
  4. In later times, scarves were also worn by soldiers of all ranks in Croatia around the 17th century. The only difference in the soldiers’ scarves that designated a difference in rank was that the officers had silk scarves whilst the other ranks were issued with cotton scarves. Some of the Croatian soldiers served as mercenaries with the French forces.
  5. Men’s scarves were sometimes referred to as “cravats” (from the French cravate, meaning “Croat”), and were the precursor of the necktie.  We’ve heard the term used even today, often associated with formalwear. Scarves that are used to cover the lower part of face are sometimes called a cowl and can be colloquially called a neck-wrap.
  6. The main manufacturer of fashion scarves used today is China; India, Hong Kong and Indonesia close behind. The most common materials used to make fashion scarves are silk, fleece, cotton, modal and pashmina or other cashmere wool in three basic scarf shapes: square, triangular and rectangular.
  7. The longest knitted scarf measures 14,978 ft 6.16 in. long and was achieved by Helge Johansen (Norway), in Oslo, Norway, on 12 November 2013. It’s taken nimble-fingered Norwegian 30 years to knit his neck-warmer to an incredible 4,565.46 m –sufficient to stretch the entire length of Central Park in Manhattan, New York. In order to measure his knitwear for Guinness World Records Day 2013, Helge unraveled his scarf – which he usually keeps in a ball – in a sports center in Oslo, Norway, snaking the scarf in dozens of tight loops. Cambodia’s longest hand-woven scarf, or krama in Khmer language, was included in the Guinness Book of Records as the longest scarf in the world in 2018.  The 88-cm-wide and 1,149.8-meter-long krama was taken nearly five months to be made by weavers from 20 krama weaving communities, and thousands of visitors had also added a few centimeters to the large krama when they visited its weaving site in front of the National Museum in Phnom Penh.
  8. The scarf became a real fashion accessory by the early 19th century for both men and women. By the middle of the 20th century, scarves became a most essential and versatile clothing accessories.
  9. In cold climates, a thick knitted scarf, often made of wool, is tied around the neck to keep warm. This is usually accompanied by a heavy jacket or coat.
  10. In drier, dustier warm climates, or in environments where there are many airborne contaminants, a thin headscarf, kerchief, or bandanna is often worn over the eyes and nose and mouth to keep the hair clean. Over time, this custom has evolved into a fashionable item in many cultures, particularly among women.
  11. In India, woolen scarfs with Bandhani work are becoming very popular. Bandhani or Bandhej is the name of the tie and dye technique used commonly in Bhuj and Mandvi of the Kutch District of Gujarat State.
  12. Scarfs can be tied around the neck in many ways including the pussy-cat bow, the square knot, the cowboy bib, the ascot knot, the loop, the necktie, and the gypsy kerchief. Scarfs can also be tied in various ways on the head.  Several Christian denominations include a scarf known as a Stole as part of their liturgical vestments.
  13. In uniforms, silk scarves were used by pilots of early aircraft in order to keep oily smoke from the exhaust out of their mouths while flying. These were worn by pilots of closed cockpit aircraft to prevent neck chafing, especially by fighter pilots, who were constantly turning their heads from side to side watching for enemy aircraft. Today, military flight crews wear scarves imprinted with unit insignia and emblems not for functional reasons but instead for esprit-de-corps and heritage.
  14. At graduation, students traditionally wear academic scarves with distinctive combinations of striped colors identifying their individual university or college.
  15. Members of the Scouting movement wear a scarf-like item called a neckerchief as part of their uniform, which is sometimes referred to as a scarf. In some Socialist countries Young pioneers wore a neckerchief called a red scarf.
  16. Since at least the early 1900s, when the phenomenon began in Britain, colored scarves have been traditional supporter wear for fans of association football teams across the world, even those in warmer climates. These scarves come in a wide variety of sizes and are made in a club’s particular colors and may contain the club crest, pictures of renowned players, and various slogans relating to the history of the club and its rivalry with others. Now you know why all four houses at Hogwarts had different color scarfs!
  17. At some clubs supporters will sometimes perform a ‘scarf wall’ in which all supporters in a section of the stadium will stretch out their scarves above their heads with both hands, creating an impressive ‘wall’ of color.  This is usually accompanied by the singing of a club anthem such as “You’ll Never Walk Alone” at Liverpool F.C., “Grazie Roma” at A.S. Roma or “Africa” by Toto at Columbus Crew matches.  This was initially solely a British phenomenon, but has since spread to the rest of Europe, North and South America. Some clubs supporters will perform a scarf ‘twirl’ or ‘twirly’ in which a group of supporters hold the scarves above their heads with one hand, and twirl the scarf, creating a ‘blizzard’ of color. This is usually accompanied by a club anthem such as “Hey Jude” at Heart of Midlothian F.C.
  18. Scarf wearing is also a noted feature of support for Australian rules football clubs in the Australian Football League. The scarves are in the form of alternating bars of color, usually with the team name or mascot written on each second bar.
  19. The craft of knitting garments such as scarves is an important trade in some countries. Hand-knitted scarves are still common as gifts as well.
  20. Printed scarves are additionally offered internationally through high fashion design houses. Among the latter are Burberry, Missoni, Alexander McQueen, Cole Haan, Chanel, Etro, Lanvin, Hermès, Nicole Miller, Ferragamo, Emilio Pucci, Dior, Fendi, Louis Vuitton and Prada.

 

 

Let’s Go

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(left column top to bottom) Cuyahoga Valley Scenic Railroad; Authentic family recipe Greek baked goods in Cincinnati; The World’s First Beer Hotel — With In-room Taps and Shower Mini-bars in Columbus (Really!); In any season Medina is so darn charming; The spectacular Cincinnati Museum Center at Union Terminal; Our beautiful state flag! (right column top to bottom) The wedge salad at Ninety One Wood Fired Oven in Jackson Township (the steaks are awesome, too); The famous “Y” bridge in Zanesville; Visit Milan and the birthplace museum of one of the greatest minds of the 20th century; When you’re in Cinci, get your coffee fix at Felix; Amish Country is great for scenic drives, wonderful food and interesting shopping opportunities;   Exploring the parks in Ohio can take up a lot of your free time.

 

As we all turn the page to 2019, I took some time this week and reflected on those things that I really enjoyed this past year, those things that gave me pause, and those things I wanted to continue to do.  Morning runs, foodie experiments with my kids, sampling craft beers and tasty coffee, a plate of hot tater tots at my favorite stop, breakfasts with my golf buddies, and most of all my day trips with Jackie.  Of course, we didn’t do enough of them, but when we did, we always enjoyed exploring and experiencing things we knew were nearby, but never took the time to go visit. I came across a neat website called Ohio Explored, https://www.ohioexplored.com filled with “tons” of cool ideas – food, wine, breweries, crafts, hotels, parks, trails, and a bunch of small businesses throughout the state.  As a small business owner, I salute these brave souls – both the start-ups and the established entrepreneurs.  Seemed like the more I explored on the site, the more cool ideas I came across – handmade jam, vintage clothing, retreat spaces, live music, wine spots and of course food – lots of food – best tacos, best pizza, best coffee and some of the best things made in Ohio – ceramics, art, crafts, cookies, jewelry – and the list goes on.  So, for my New Year’s resolution, after I solve your pesky PIA (pain in the @%$) Jobs!, I’ll be jumping in the heat mobile and hitting the road, reporting back on the great things I find.  And I hope you do the same – as you explore, be sure to shoot me a note on the visits, with any photos I can share with our readers.  All the best in 2019.

 

MORE LINKS TO EXPLORE BEFORE YOU EXPLORE OHIO:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bubbly

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One of my favorite parts of New Year’s Eve, aside from the eating, and the hugging and the kissing at midnight, is a sip of Champagne. I’m not much of an expert, but I do love the sweet bubbles and clean taste.  I did some digging and found a fun website filled with trivia and information to share.

Before you read on, here’s a toast from our family to yours:

Our Best to All – May You Have the Most Glorious New Year
—All The Gang at Kowalski Heat Treating

Special thanks to champaigne-booking.com for the info.  Enjoy your family and friends, and remember, safe driving is no accident!  Be Smart and Be Safe this New Year’s Eve and throughout the year.

  1. The sparkling version of the Champagne wine was discovered by accident. It all began when the wine growers (today’s famous Champagne Houses) from the Champagne region of France were trying to equal the Burgundy wines. However, they did not succeed due to the cold winters in the region that caused the fermentation of the wine, lying in the cellars, to stop.
  2. The cold climate ensured that the sleeping yeast cells awoke again in spring and started fermenting causing the release of carbon dioxide gas, which was coming from the wine in the bottle. At first, the bottles were weak and exploded but the ones that survived contained the sparkling wine.
  3. The King of France, Hugh Capet, started serving the sparkling wine during official dinners at the Royal Palace. In the years after 1715, the Duke of Orléans introduced the sparkling version of the Champagne wine to the rich and famous.
  4. One of the many different stories about the history of Champagne is that the monk Dom Pérignon had invented the Champagne. This story is doubtful because several documents that have been found, show that an Englishman had already produced the sparkling wine and that Dom Pérignon at first tried to eliminate the bubbles in the wine, because the bottles would break under the pressure of the second fermentation.
  5. Dom Pérignon started with the production of wines in the Champagne region in 1668. He is the inventor of the second fermentation in the bottle what makes him for sure the founder of the Champagne as we know it. Dom Pérignon was also the first winemaker who produced white wine of blue grapes; he also developed the regulated Méthode Traditionelle (before 1994 named the Méthode Champenoise). Besides this, he is also the founder of various techniques for producing sparkling wine as is still known by people.
  6. Champagne is a sparkling wine which is exclusively produced in the Champagne region by the regulated Méthode Traditionelle. Only wines that are made by this procedure and grown in this area are allowed to carry the name Champagne. Most drink Champagne as an aperitif, accompanying your meal or just on a normal weekday when you are in the mood to drink Champagne. A large part of the appeal of Champagne is due to the bubbles that spill forth when the bottle is uncorked.  For some, it is always Champagne time!
  7. The grapes that are used to produce Champagne include Chardonnay: white grape, Pinot Noir: black grape, Pinot Meunier: black grape (white juice).  Pinot Noir and Pinot Meunier are the only two black grapes permitted to produce Champagne. Of note: Petit Meslier, Pinot Blanc and Arbane are grapes that still exist and are also used for the production of Champagne. However, they cannot be replanted again.
  8. The characteristics of the grapes are Pinot Noir: power and structure, is well cultivated in cool regions with chalky limestone soil. Pinot Meunier: smooth, fruitiness, floral aromas, little time to ripe in the bottle, quicker to consume.  Chardonnay: fresh, delicate, elegance and finesse.
  9. When buying champagne, don’t just grab a bottle and run – look for:  AOC: Appellation d’Origine Contrôlée (the French quality mark, the name “Champagne” should be clearly visible), the logo, the brand, the name of the producer or brand name, the location and country of origin (France), the type, the percentage of alcohol, the volume of the bottle, the ingredients: if not mentioned on the bottle, the Champagne is a Non-Vintage Brut and almost certainly blended with the three primary grape varieties, the vintage: in case it contains 100% grapes from one specific year, this will be indicated on the bottle, the village of origin: village names explicitely mentioned denote the sole origin of the Champagne; otherwise, place names merely indicate the location of the producer. As qualified, it will indicate whether it is from Grand Cru or Premier Cru vineyard and information about the vines, date of dégorgement, the characteristics of the aroma and taste, associations with meals.

And, for the enthusiast (or snob as you may prefer…)

  1. More than 15,000 wine growers are responsible for the cultivation of 90% of the Champagne region. Some produce their own wines; some sell their grapes to other (bigger) Champagne Houses. According to the law of 1927, the part of the appellation Champagne covers 34,000 hectares.
  2. Terroir is how a particular region’s climate, soils and aspect (terrain) affect the taste of the wine. Some regions are said to have more ‘terroir’ than others.
  3. Champagne is best to be stored at a temperature around 7-12°C.  Champagne is best to be served at a temperature around 8-10°C.
  4. The size of the bubbles of Champagne is a result of how cold it was in the cellar. The colder the cellar, the smaller the bubbles and the better the quality.
  5. 1 bottle of Champagne contains about 1.2 kg grapes.
  6. Only wine of grapes that are cultivated in the Champagne region by the Méthode Traditionelle are allowed to carry the name Champagne.
  7. About 90% of the Champagnes are a blend of 2/3 black grapes and 1/3 Chardonnay.
  8. Sparkling wines such as Prosecco, Cava and Sekt are made of another quality and variety of grapes than the ones used in the Champagne region.
  9. A Riddler is a person who shakes, turns and moves the bottles in order for the sediment float into the bottleneck. A Riddler normally handles 20,000 to 30,000 bottles per day.
  10. Grand Cru or Premier Cru refers to the best-rated villages of the Champagne region. There are 17 Grand Crus, for example: Ambonnay, Avize, Aye, Bouzy, Cramant, Le Mesnil-sur-Oger, Tours-sur-Marne and 41 Premier Crus, for example: Chouilly, Hautvillier, Marcel-sur-Ay. Champagne varies in price. However, a good Champagne does not have to be expensive, just let your personal taste decide which type of Champagne fits your budget.
  11. Cuvée: the first pressing. Taille: the second pressing. Débourbage: undoing the impurities from the pressed grape juice.
  12. Chaptalization process: adding sugar to the juice to increase the alcohol percentage. The yeast in the barrels transforms the sugar into alcohol.
  13. Malolactic fermentation: the bacteria’s that change the malic acid into lactic acid.
  14. The reserve wine gives Champagne the taste of consistent stability.
  15. After the main production process, the Champagne wine has to be kept in the cellars for a few years in order to get the mild taste.
  16. Non-Vintage Champagnes have to be stored in the cellars for a minimum of 15 months and Vintage Champagnes for a minimum of 3 years.  The longer the Champagne ripens in the cellars, the better the taste. However, this is only applicable when the yeast is in the bottle.
  17. Dead yeast cells give the Champagne the taste of bread dough and brioche.
  18. In the early days the Champagne was drunk with the sediment still in it.

And, for my process engineers out there:
The production process of Champagne

1. The Harvest
The grapes are picked by hand between August and October, the harvest time depends on how ripe the grapes are. The wine producers, such as Champagne Roger Constant-Lemaire in Villers-sous-Châtillon, are not allowed to pick the grapes with a machine. The grapes have to be picked by hand so that only the best and ripened grapes are contributed to the Champagne. After picking the grapes, they are pressed carefully to keep the juice clear white.

2. The First Fermentation
The juice is put into a tank and the first fermentation takes place. The result is an acidic still wine that has been fermented dry completely. (The wine producer sees to it that all the natural sugar present in the grapes is fermented out of the wine). Some wine producers, like Champagne Alfred Gratien in Epernay, choose for fermentation in a barrel, a technique that is more difficult to master with sparkling wine.

3. The Assemblage
This is the art of blending. Still white wines combined with some reserve wines to create the base wine for Champagne; Pinot Noir, Pinot Blanc and Chardonnay are combined together. The assemblage starts in the early spring, about 5 months after the harvest.

4. The Second Fermentation
A mixture of yeast, yeast nutrients and sugar (liqueur de tirage) that is added to the wine in the second yeasting, the wine is put in a thick glass bottle and sealed with a bottle cap. The wine bottles are placed in a cool cellar to ferment slowly and to produce alcohol and carbon dioxide. This is the most important part; the carbon dioxide cannot escape from the bottle and solves in the bottle; you will get the sparkling wine because of the carbon dioxide.

5. The Aging
As the fermentation proceeds, yeast cells die and after several months, the fermentation process is complete. However, the Champagne continues to age in the cool cellar for several more years resulting in a toasty, yeasty character. During this aging period, the yeast cells split open and spill into the solution imparting complex, yeasty flavours to the Champagne. The best and most expensive Champagne is aged for five years or more. This process completes the second fermentation.

6. The Riddling
After the aging process is completed, the dead yeast cells are removed through a process known as riddling. The Champagne bottle is placed upside down in a holder with a 75-degree angle. Each day, the riddler gives the bottle a 1/8th of a turn whilst keeping it upside down. This procedure forces the dead yeast cells float into the bottleneck where they are subsequently removed.  The bottles are placed in racks with the bottlenecks facing downwards. Madame Veuve Cliquot is the inventor of the bottle rack in which the bottles are put downwards.

7. The Disgorging
The disgorgement is the final step in the production of Champagne. The Champagne bottle is kept upside down while the neck is frozen in an ice-salt bath. This procedure results in the formation of a plug of frozen wine containing the dead yeast cells. Finally, the bottle cap is removed and the pressure of the carbon dioxide gas in the bottle forces the plug of frozen wine out (“disgorging”) leaving behind clear Champagne. By doing so, a little bit of wine gets spilled out of the bottle.

8. The Dosage
A mixture of white wine, brandy and sugar (Liqueur de tirage/Liqueur d’expédition) is added to adjust the sweetness level of the wine and to top up the bottle. This procedure decides whether the Champagne will be Brut Nature, Extra Brut, Brut, Extra Dry, Dry, Semi Dry or Doux. This mixture is differs per Champagne House and is a well-kept secret.

9. The Corking
The bottle is corked and the cork is wired down to secure the high internal pressure of the carbon dioxide in the Champagne.

10:  The Drinking
POP – Happy New Year !!

 

 

 

Understanding Ho Ho Ho

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How DOES he do it??

It used to be that people took it on faith that Santa Claus and his reindeer could fly. Long before we became the skeptics we are today, no one really cared how the big guy accomplished his seemingly impossible trek through the atmosphere every Christmas Eve.  We just believed.  But, alas, times have changed.  Now people want to know exactly how – or even if – Santa does it each year. And the only way to keep them happy is to demonstrate through reason, logic, and pure, hard science that maybe, just maybe, old St. Nick can actually get in the air with his sleigh and reindeer, zip around the globe and deliver his toys of joy.  So, I decided to look at what Santa purports to do each year, and realized he’s harnessed some basic rules of physics, aerodynamics, thermal dynamics (my favorite), a little reindeer biology. Let’s just say it’s a combination of air speed, lift, fairy dust and the magic Christmas spirit.  (the exact combination is a trade secret that Santa does not even share completely).

His Sleigh
It all starts with the sleigh.  While most contemporary artists draw Santa’s sleigh as the classic 19th century wooden carriage, that can’t be accurate. It just doesn’t fly, you might say.  In order to get airborne, I found out the sleigh is constructed of super-thin aluminum alloys (Santa calls it “elfluminum”) that cuts down on weight (and when Santa’s inside, reducing weight is very important).

Very important is the curved front end, that creates lift – putting more pressure under the sleigh than over the top.  To make sure the wind beneath his sleigh exerts more pressure than the wind above it, Santa has designed it much like the folks at the airlines – curved on top and flat on the bottom. That design increases the air speed above the wings, which is vital since, faster air speed results in lower air pressure and contributes to that much-desired lift.

It’s called Bernoulli’s Theorem https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernoulli%27s_principle, discovered by 16th century Swiss mathematician Daniel Bernoulli. His observations of fluid dynamics are at the heart of flight lift.  But let’s just say someone else a little further to the north might have known about it centuries earlier.

With the properly designed sleigh underneath his jelly belly and bag of endless toys, Santa then has to generate enough speed to get the lift needed to take off. Airplanes do it with powerful engines. But engines, of course, are very loud and would wake the children of the world as Santa makes his rounds.  That’s where his reindeer come in.

The Reindeer
Reindeer are hearty enough to survive conditions at the North Pole but quiet enough so as not to disturb his young customers as the big guy flies over their homes and lands on their rooftops.  Normal reindeer can run fast – by animal standards, at least – about 35 mph. That’s a lot slower than the 150 mph threshold when most jumbo jets take off but, of course, the reindeer have something else helping them out – their antlers.  These appendages also create lift.  With the air rushing underneath those antlers at a higher pressure than the air above, the nine reindeer can generate lift of their own and get airborne at lower speeds than otherwise needed.

Once in the air, some other parts of the reindeer’s anatomy help Santa stay up without crashing or destroying all those toys. On the ground, the reindeer generate the force needed to move forward by stomping their extra-wide hooves as they run. Normally, that force only sticks around for as long as there is something – like the ground – to react to the force of the reindeer’s kicking.  But this is Christmas, so, once in the air, to help keep them airborne, some scientists observe “good for kicking and paddling through the air.”  Scientists also think that the reindeer’s hollow hair is something special – which helps insulate their bodies in winter time – and allows the wind to blow right through the animals’ fur without creating that dreaded drag or slowing Santa down.

The Delivery
Based on census data, there are about 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But, since Santa doesn’t visit all the children, that reduces his workload to about 15% of the total – 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average census rate of 3.5 children per household, that’s 91.8 million homes – assuming of course there is at least “one” good child in each home.

Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth (he travels east to west which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Makes perfect sense to me.  Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, (not counting “necessary” stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours), plus feeding the reindeer.

This means that Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. (For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second) but hey, he’s Santa.

The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets one small gift (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying about 321,300 tons, not counting the reindeer or Santa, who is invariably described as “overweight”. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds (we’d need 214,200 reindeer).  This is precisely why Santa sprinkles them with magic Santa dust.

Basic Science Proves it All
So, let’s see – over 300,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance – this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. A lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Now, of course normal reindeer could not withstand this amount of heat (the entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second) – that’s why Santa put Rudolf and his shiny red nose at the lead. (Duh!)

And, if Santa didn’t have his special red suit that Mrs. Claus made for him, he would be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force. But of course, he’s protected by his magic suit, and the air barrier around him (second duh!)

According to Arnold Pompos, a really smart guy at Purdue University, Santa would have to travel a total of 160,000,000km – further than the distance from the Earth to the Sun –  at a speed of 4,705,882km/h, far slower than the speed of light, but still fast enough that the air resistance would likely to vaporize Santa, along with all the children’s gifts… if he wasn’t riding a magic sleigh of course – (third duh!)

All in all, I still enjoy the love and joy and magic of Santa and his reindeer – on behalf of all the KHT Elves, loving every minute of your PIA (Pain in the @%$) Jobs, Merry Christmas to All and to all a good “flight”

To track Santa, go to www.noradsanta.org .

 

 

 

You have to see these photos!

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Some of the 100 best National Geographic photos for 2018:(top) The world’s largest colony of black-browed albatrosses is in the Falkland Islands. PHOTOGRAPH BY PAUL NICKLEN; (Row two left) Moon jellies, found all over the world. PHOTOGRAPH BY DAVID LIITTSCHWAGER; (Row two right) Puma courtship. PHOTOGRAPH BY INGO ARNDT; (Row three) A man floats on the north arm of Utah’s Great Salt Lake. In the hypersaline water, he found it hard to sit up and hit the bottom in water only a foot deep. PHOTOGRAPH BY CAROLYN DRAKE; (Row four left) Snowball, a sulphur-crested cockatoo, dances in time to the Backstreet Boys’ tune “Everybody”. PHOTOGRAPH BY VINCENT J. MUSI; (Row four right) This young elephant, lovingly cared for at a retreat in Nairobi. PHOTOGRAPH BY CHARLIE HAMILTON JAMES; (Row five left) The Italian astronaut Samantha Cristoforetti holds the record for the second longest uninterrupted spaceflight by a woman at 199 days. PHOTOGRAPH BY MARTIN SCHOELLER; (Row five right) A polar bear family at the Beaufort Sea. PHOTOGRAPH BY FLORIAN SCHULZ. See all 100 of these great photos HERE.

Chosen as the best. It’s an honor, fleeting at times, yet important.  At KHT, we’re always striving for “best” – best solution to you PIA (pain in the @%$) Jobs!, best response time, best delivery, best product performance – and on and on.  We, like most of you, pride ourselves on striving to be the best, then resetting the bar.

Every year National Geographic invites travelers from around the world to submit photographs from their adventures – and, wow they are amazing.  Each selected image has a backstory, on where it was taken and how it happened.  We thought we’d share some of our favorites, and also provide you the links to explore on your own.  Enjoy, and thanks to Nat Geo for these awesome “bests” – we salute you, the judges and all the winners.

 

 

 

 

Live in Infamy

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(top left) The USS Arizona during the attack on Hawaii. (top right) A war bonds poster. The headline says “Tojo Wanna Cracker?” (row 2 left) The bombs on Hiroshima (Aug. 6, 1945) and Nagasaki (Aug. 9, 1945) finally ended the war in the Pacific. (row 2 right) Hideki Tojo, prime minister of Japan (1941–44), at his war crimes trial in 1948, was hanged as a Class-A war criminal December 23, 1948. (the other three images) Three views of the USS Arizona Memorial in Hawaii.

Today we are reminded of “a date which will live in infamy” – the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor.  Let us take a moment to respect those brave individuals who serve(d), better understand the events leading up to the event and reflect on the ongoing role of the US as the world’s peacekeeper.  Special thanks to Wikipedia and Air and Space Museum for the insights.

  • The attack on Pearl Harbor, many believe, can be traced back to the 1850’s, when U.S. Naval Captain Matthew C. Perry sailed to Japan and negotiated the opening of Japanese ports for trade. After more than 200 years of self-imposed isolation, Japan wanted to engage with the rest of the world and knew its fortunes lie outside its shores.
  • To compete globally, Japan needed resources—a theme that persistently and eventually pushes the narrative of Pearl Harbor to its climax. Iron and coal were key natural resources in the steam era at the end of the 19th century but were not available in any significance on the Japanese island. Japan needed to look elsewhere for oil and vital manufacturing resources.
  • Beginning around 1894, Japan engaged in war with China and in 1904 with Russia to secure more resources.  A 1905 win against the Russian Navy shocked the world and alerted the U.S. that they needed to be prepared for new relations with a more aggressive Japan.
  • As early as 1911, the U.S. Navy drafted plans for dealing with a possible war with Japan, known as War Plan Orange. The 1921 Washington Naval Treaty set out to prevent expensive naval building races between nations, but limited Japan to a much smaller navy than the U.S., a result that further soured the relationship between the two countries.
  • The relationship between the two countries was cordial enough that they remained trading partners. Tensions did not seriously grow until Japan’s invasion of Manchuria in 1931. Over the next decade, Japan expanded into China, leading to the Second Sino-Japanese War in 1937. Japan spent considerable effort trying to isolate China and endeavored to secure enough independent resources to attain victory on the mainland. The “Southern Operation” was designed to assist these efforts.
  • Starting in December 1937, events such as the Japanese attack on USS Panay, the Allison incident, and the Nanking Massacre swung Western public opinion sharply against Japan. Fearing Japanese expansion, the United States, United Kingdom, and France assisted China with loans for war supply contracts.  The goal was simple – keep Japan at bay.
  • In 1940, Japan invaded French Indochina, attempting to stymie the flow of supplies reaching China. The United States halted shipments of airplanes, parts, machine tools, and aviation gasoline to Japan, which the latter perceived as an unfriendly act. The United States did not stop oil exports, however, partly because of the prevailing sentiment in Washington: given Japanese dependence on American oil, such an action was likely to be considered an extreme provocation.
  • In response, President Franklin D. Roosevelt moved the Pacific Fleet from San Diego to Hawaii. He also ordered a military buildup in the Philippines, taking both actions in the hope of discouraging Japanese aggression in the Far East. Because the Japanese high command was (mistakenly) certain any attack on the United Kingdom’s Southeast Asian colonies, including Singapore, would bring the U.S. into the war, a devastating preventive strike appeared to be the only way to prevent American naval interference.
  • In September 1940, Japan aligned with Germany and Italy. Japan hoped the war would result in a boon of new resources and saw the alignment as a way to push back against the U.S. embargos.  If America wanted to declare war on Japan, they would also have to declare war on Germany meaning a fight across two oceans.
  • An invasion of the Philippines was also considered necessary by Japanese war planners. The U.S. War Plan Orange had envisioned defending the Philippines with an elite force of 40,000 men; this option was never implemented due to opposition from Douglas MacArthur, who felt he would need a force ten times that size. By 1941, U.S. planners expected to abandon the Philippines at the outbreak of war.
  • The U.S. finally ceased oil exports to Japan in July 1941, following the seizure of French Indochina after the Fall of France, in part because of new American restrictions on domestic oil consumption. Because of this decision, Japan proceeded with plans to take the oil-rich Dutch East Indies. On August 17, Roosevelt warned Japan that America was prepared to take opposing steps if “neighboring countries” were attacked. The Japanese were faced with a dichotomy—either withdraw from China and lose face or seize new sources of raw materials in the resource-rich European colonies of Southeast Asia.
  • The U.S. believed that Japan would run out of necessary resources in six months and would have to agree to negotiations or cease military action. Japan did the same math and realized they needed to act. Japan began to plan the attack on Pearl Harbor.
  • Many within the Japanese military were wary of the risks—Japanese carriers did not have the range to make it to Pearl Harbor and would need to refuel at sea, a maneuver that was unfamiliar to their navy. But to Japan, the potential reward outweighed the risks. They believed an attack on the U.S. would prevent America from entering the war for up to six months. In that time, Japan could shift the balance of power and take Malaya and the Dutch East Indies. Japan also hoped the attack would demoralize the United States into inaction.
  • The Japanese Marshal Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto knew that to be successful secrecy was key. Few within the military were aware of what was conspired. Japanese carriers would take an extremely northern path to avoid shipping routes, and while travelling they were under complete radio silence. Even ship-to-ship communication was done using flags or blinker lights.
  • The final orders to attack Pearl Harbor were delivered to the ships by hand before they sailed on November 26th.  Burke noted that, at the time, the U.S. had only broken Japan’s diplomatic codes, not their naval codes. But even if the U.S. could read Japanese naval codes, there was no radio traffic to intercept.
  • Japan set an internal deadline: If negotiations with the U.S. did not go as desired, Pearl Harbor would be attacked. They pushed the deadline to November 29th. Three days later, the Japanese high command sent the message, “Climb Mount Niitaka,” to tell the listening Japanese carrier force to proceed with the attack.  War declaration communications were drafted and sent to the U.S. leadership, but never arrived on time.
  • What unfolded in the days to come is the story we’re more familiar with—2,403 Americans were killed, 188 U.S. aircraft were destroyed, and the heart of the Pacific Fleet was left sitting on the harbor’s bottom.
  • Said Pearl Harbor curator Lawrence Burke said, “We can see why Americans should have anticipated war with the Japanese.” But the specifics of the attack were a surprise. The U.S. knew something was afoot but anticipated being attacked in the Philippines not Pearl Harbor. The U.S. knew the risks that Japan faced with an attack on Pearl and believed it to be impossible. And the U.S. did not believe that Japan was capable of planning and executing such an attack.
  • To say that Pearl Harbor was a complete surprise, as most history books do, does not take into account the complex history and relationships between the U.S. and Japan leading up to the attack. The war with Japan was not a surprise, but the location and nature of the first strike was.

To learn more, visit  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Pearl_Harbor_looking_southwest-Oct41.jpg, and God bless the brave souls who lost their lives defending our great nation.

On December 8, 1941 President Franklin D. Roosevelt delivers his Declaration of War Address to congress and later officially signs it.  WATCH HERE

 

 

 

A Shopping We Will Go

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Christmas shopping is so much fun…totally worth being exhausted at the end. 

It’s that time of year – when we head out into cyberspace, or parking space, to find that “special” gift for each of our loved ones.  With only 25 shopping days left, now’s the time to get your lists completed, and hit the road.  Even though this can be the ultimate PIA (pain in the @%$) Job!, I’ve always enjoyed this tradition – I get together with Jackie and each of the girls, and we make a day of it – walking, talking, drifting from store to store in search of the “one” item that will delight Although I have to admit,  we usually end up at one of our favorite restaurants – a wonderful means to an end!  To get your juices flowing, here’s a whole bunch of random link ideas – some traditional, some new, some just “techy”, and some worldly – Enjoy, and thanks to Smart Gadgets, Uncommon Goods, House Beautiful, Target, Esquire and Elle Décor.

My Smart Gadgets

Uncommon Goods

House Beautiful Shopping

Target – Toys

Esquire – Gifts for Men

Elle Décor – worldly

 

 

 

 

Oh Grannie

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M-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m-m, pies!!!
Makin’ em & bakin’ em is a family affair. But I won’t lie, I’m especially partial to eaten‘ em!!!

While most of you are feeling the “stretch” of yesterday’s meals (I never just eat once) and are now digging into the fridge for those amazing leftovers, I on the other hand, am reaching for the thanksgiving unsung hero – extra pie.  Of course, I’ve already had my leftover turkey, and stuffing, and cranberry sauce – jellied not that lumpy stuff! and potatoes, and vegi’s, So it’s just right that I finish my re-tasting with a nice couple slices of pie.  A little Grannie apple, followed by a smidge of pumpkin, topped with whipped cream and ice cream and a cool glass of soy milk (you’re welcome Jackie!).  Not sure what it’s like at your house, but I just love it when Jackie and the girls crack open the recipe books, whip up the family favorite’s,  especially, Chocolate Pecan pie and treats us to good cookin’. Although I love to cook,  for some reason I tend to cause a ruckus in the kitchen during baking so I have been banished.  So, for my foodies out there, here’s a little “pie” trivia (thanks American Pie Council and Wikipedia).  Enjoy. And look for the links throughout for fun leftover meals.

  1. A pie is a baked dish which is usually made of a pastry dough casing that covers or completely contains a filling of various sweet or savoury ingredients.
  2. Pies are defined by their crusts. A filled pie (also single-crust or bottom-crust), has pastry lining the baking dish, and the filling is placed on top of the pastry but left open. A top-crust pie has the filling in the bottom of the dish and is covered with a pastry or other covering before baking. A two-crust pie has the filling completely enclosed in the pastry shell.  Shortcrust pastry is a typical kind of pastry used for pie crusts, but many things can be used, including baking powder biscuits, mashed potatoes, and crumbs.
  3. Ancient Greeks are believed to have originated pie pastry. In the plays of Aristophanes (5th century BC), there are mentions of sweetmeats including small pastries filled with fruit. Nothing is known of the actual pastry used, but the Greeks certainly recognized the trade of pastry-cook as distinct from that of baker. A rich pastry, intended to be eaten, was used to make small pasties containing eggs or little birds which were among the minor items served at banquets.
  4. During the Egyptian Neolithic period or New Stone Age period, the use of stone tools shaped by polishing or grinding, the domestication of plants and animals, the establishment of permanent villages, and the practice of crafts such as pottery and weaving became common. Early pies were in the form of flat, round or freeform crusty cakes called galettes consisting of a crust of ground oats, wheat, rye, or barley containing honey inside.
  5. Early pies made by the Roman most likely came from the Greeks.  These pies were sometimes made in “reeds” which were used for the sole purpose of holding the filling and not for eating with the filling.  The Romans must have spread the word about pies around Europe as the Oxford English Dictionary notes that the word pie was a popular word in the 14th century. The first pie recipe was published by the Romans and was for a rye-crusted goat cheese and honey pie.
  6. The 1st-century Roman cookbook Apicius makes various mentions of recipes which involve a pie case.  By 160 BC, Roman statesman Marcus Porcius Cato (234–149 BC), who wrote De Agri Cultura, notes the recipe for the most popular pie/cake called placenta. Also called libum by the Romans, it was more like a modern-day cheesecake on a pastry base, often used as an offering to the gods. With the development of the Roman Empire and its efficient road transport, pie cooking spread throughout Europe.
  7. Pies made centuries ago were predominately meat pies, and originally appeared in England as early as the twelfth century. The crust of the pie was referred to as “coffyn”. There was actually more crust than filling. Often these pies were made using fowl and the legs were left to hang over the side of the dish and used as handles. Fruit pies or tarts (pasties) were probably first made in the 1500s. English tradition credits making the first cherry pie to Queen Elizabeth I.
  8. Song birds at the time were a delicacy and protected by Royal Law. At the coronation of eight-year-old English King Henry VI (1422–1461) in 1429, “Partrich” and “Pecok enhakill” were served, alleged by some modern writers to consist of cooked peacock mounted in its skin on a peacock-filled pie. Cooked birds were frequently placed by European royal cooks on top of a large pie to identify its contents, leading to its later adaptation in pre-Victorian times as a porcelain ornament to release of steam and identify a good pie.
  9. Meat pies with fillings such as steak, cheese, steak and kidney, minced beef, or chicken and mushroom are popular in the United Kingdom, Australia, South Africa and New Zealand as take-away snacks. They are also served with chips as an alternative to fish and chips at British chip shops.
  10. Pie came to America with the first English settlers. The early colonists cooked their pies in long narrow pans calling them “coffins” like the crust in England. As in the Roman times, the early American pie crusts often were not eaten, but simply designed to hold the filling during baking. It was during the American Revolution that the term crust was used instead of coffin.
  11. The Pilgrim fathers and early settlers brought their pie recipes with them to America, adapting to the ingredients and techniques available to them in the New World. Their first pies were based on berries and fruits pointed out to them by the Native North Americans.  Pies allowed colonial cooks to stretch ingredients and also used round shallow pans to literally “cut corners” and to create a regional variation of shallow pie.
  12. Pies remained as a staple of traveling and working peoples in the colder northern European countries, with regional variations based on both the locally grown and available meats, as well as the locally farmed cereal crop. The Cornish pasty is an adaptation of the pie to a working man’s daily food needs.
  13. Pot pies with a flaky crust and bottom are also a popular American dish, typically with a filling of meat (particularly beef, chicken, or turkey), gravy, and mixed vegetables (potatoes, carrots, and peas). Frozen pot pies are often sold in individual serving size – (on a good day I can eat two or three).
  14. Fruit pies may be served with a scoop of ice cream, a style known in North America as pie à la mode. Many sweet pies are served this way. Apple pie is a traditional choice, though any pie with sweet fillings may be served à la mode. This combination, and possibly the name as well, is thought to have been popularized in the mid-1890s in the United States.  Apple pie can be made with a variety of apples: Golden Delicious, Pink Lady, Granny Smith, and Rome Beauty, Macintosh, Red Delicious and more.
  15. “Chess pie” was popular in the South—a silky pie with a rich filling of sugar, cream or buttermilk, egg, and sometimes bourbon. The Pennsylvania Dutch made molasses “shoofly” pies, as well as stew-like savory meat pies known as “bott boi,” or pot pie. Settlers in Florida, utilizing the plentiful local citrus, turned native limes into key lime pie. The state of New Hampshire became known for its fried hand pies, quaintly called “crab lanterns.” The Midwest, famous for its dairy farms, favored cheese and cream pies. French immigrants to New Orleans created the pecan pie after the Native Americans introduced them to pecans. Massachusetts invented the beloved Boston Cream Pie, a hybrid pie-cake.
  16. According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the largest pumpkin pie ever baked weighed 2,020 pounds and measured just over 12 feet long. It was made with 900 pounds of pumpkin, 62 gallons of evaporated milk, 155 dozen eggs, 300 pounds of sugar, 3.5 pounds of salt, 7 pounds of cinnamon and 2 pounds of pumpkin spice.
  17. Over the years, pie has evolved to become what it is today “the most traditional American dessert”. Pie has become so much a part of American culture throughout the years, that we now commonly use the term “as American as apple pie.”

 

 

Equal.

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Abraham Lincoln delivered the Gettysburg Address on the 19th of November, 1863.

Over 150 years ago, powerful words were delivered to the nation.  May we rejoice on Monday when we recognize the anniversary of the Gettysburg Address.

  • The Gettysburg Address, in which President Abraham Lincoln spoke of all men being created equal and “government of the people, by the people, for the people” was delivered on Nov 19th, 1863.  It took place at the dedication of the Soldiers’ National Cemetery in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, four and a half months after the pivotal American Civil War battle there.
  • Following the Battle of Gettysburg on July 1–3, 1863, the removal of the fallen Union soldiers from the Gettysburg Battlefield graves and their reburial in graves at the National Cemetery at Gettysburg began on October 17. In inviting President Lincoln to the ceremonies, David Wills, of the committee for the November 19 Consecration of the National Cemetery at Gettysburg, wrote, “It is the desire that, after the Oration, you, as Chief Executive of the nation, formally set apart these grounds to their sacred use by a few appropriate remarks.”
  • On the train trip from Washington, D.C., to Gettysburg on November 18, Lincoln was accompanied by three members of his Cabinet, William Seward, John Usher and Montgomery Blair, several foreign officials, his secretary John Nicolay, and his assistant secretary, John Hay. During the trip Lincoln remarked to Hay that he felt weak; on the morning of November 19, Lincoln mentioned to Nicolay that he was dizzy. (Hay later noted that during the speech Lincoln’s face had “a ghastly color” and that he was “sad, mournful, almost haggard.”)
  • The short speech had more dynamic impact following, as it did, a two-hour oration (yawn!) by Edward Everett, one-time Secretary of State.
  • John Hay, a close friend of the President, recorded how Lincoln wrote and delivered the speech:

“Lincoln was very silent all the previous evening after dinner. No one else being present he walked to and fro’ in his room apparently thinking deeply. He went to bed early, and when he came down to breakfast, he looked unwell, and said he had slept little.  On the train to the cemetery, he was silent for a considerable while, and then he asked me for some writing paper. On his knee he then wrote out his speech in full, exactly as it has come down to us.  The impression left on me was that Lincoln was merely transcribing from memory the words he had composed during the night.”

“When we reached the battlefield, Lincoln was nervous and apparently not well. Everett spoke eloquently but very long. Then Lincoln rose, holding the papers he had written on the train.  He did not read, but spoke every word in a clear, ringing, resonant, vibrating voice. His speech occupied only a few minutes in delivery. It was listened to with breathless attention and when it came to an end there was at first no cheering, but an audible indrawing of deep breath as from an audience that had been profoundly moved.”

“In the silence of the next moment, Everett leapt to his feet again and said, as nearly as I can remember, this: ‘We have just listened to a speech that will live through the ages’.”

  • Despite the historical significance of Lincoln’s speech, modern scholars disagree as to its exact wording, and contemporary transcriptions published in newspaper accounts of the event and even handwritten copies by Lincoln himself differ in their wording, punctuation, and structure.  Of these versions, the Bliss version, written well after the speech as a favor for a friend, is viewed by many as the standard text.  Its text differs, however, from the written versions prepared by Lincoln before and after his speech. It is the only version to which Lincoln affixed his signature, and the last he is known to have written.

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure. We are met on a great battle-field of that war. We have come to dedicate a portion of that field, as a final resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate—we can not consecrate—we can not hallow—this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. 

It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth.

  • After the speech, when Lincoln boarded the 6:30 pm train for Washington, D.C., he was feverish and weak, with a severe headache. A protracted illness followed, which included a vesicular rash; it was diagnosed as a mild case of smallpox. It thus seems highly likely that Lincoln was in the prodromal period of smallpox when he delivered the Gettysburg address.
  • In an oft-repeated legend, Lincoln is said to have turned to his bodyguard Ward Hill Lamon and remarked that his speech, like a bad plow, “won’t scour”. According to Garry Wills, this statement has no basis in fact and largely originates from the unreliable recollections of Lamon.  In Garry Wills’s view, “[Lincoln] had done what he wanted to do [at Gettysburg]”.
  • In a letter to Lincoln written the following day, Everett praised the President for his eloquent and concise speech, saying, “I should be glad if I could flatter myself that I came as near to the central idea of the occasion, in two hours, as you did in two minutes.” Lincoln replied that he was glad to know the speech was not a “total failure”.

Download the speech in Lincoln’s handwriting HERE.
Watch this short Ken Burns PBS piece on the Gettysburg Address HERE.